Author Archives: John

Today we traveled from Kyoto to Osaka. A short train ride, and only for one night before flying north tomorrow to Hokkaido and the Japanese version of our Pacific Northwest.

Kyoto was fantastic, and while we would have loved to stay longer, it was time to go. Perhaps we’re a little temple-d out. Every day we saw a new and impressive 500 year-old shrine or temple, but after a while, they sort-of start to look the same. Like the Grand Canyon – “wow, this is incredible…will you look at that…I’ll be damned…okay, let’s go.” And it’s also unseasonably hot in Japan for this time of year, and with all humidity and the climbing of lengthy paths and unending stairs at the sites, it’s been a somewhat sweaty affair.

But the one thing more incredible than the temples, and of course, the food (like “takotamago” – a small octopus with a quail egg shoved in its head), was the people. Everywhere we went in Kyoto, we met the nicest folks.

Take our first night. We went to a local izakaya and sat at the counter. Within minutes, we struck up a conversation with the two older gentlemen next to us. They asked about us, and where we were from, how we got to Kyoto, our general impressions. They introduced themselves – Nobuhiro and Yosiyoshi – and bought us drinks.

And throughout, they apologized that their English was bad. Like our Japanese even existed! We traded several rounds of sake, and at one point, Yosiyoshi said he was thankful to meet us, and thankful for the American people. And then he handed us this:

I have to say, I was stunned and not sure how to respond. Here I was, a guest in his country, not speaking his language, on the receiving end of his hospitality, and he thanked our country for the prosperity of his. We told him we were grateful for our friendship, on both a national and personal level. More handshakes. More drinks. More laughs.

Several nights later, after a great okonomiyaki dinner, we explored a dark, narrow alley with the sounds of tinkling glasses and singing emerging.

Here we stumbled on a row of small restaurant counters, and summoned the courage to go into one of them, finding a group of well-oiled salarymen enjoying shochu and karaoke. Almost immediately, they greeted us, asked our names, and where we were from. And then – mayhem. I was asked to sing a song. For some reason, they wanted to hear the Carpenters. I willingly obliged, and was rewarded with the first of many shochus.

We became fast friends, made faster by the lubricating effects of the drinks, and perhaps Michael Jackson’s “Beat It.” More shochu, more singing, and then one of the junior salarymen handed me his smartphone:

Yes, it was. The best day we had in Kyoto.

Last night, we celebrated our final night in Kyoto with a nightcap in a small non-descript bar, one of many in the Pontocho-dori area. The women behind the bar were welcoming, and again, asked where we were from, what our story was. An older gentleman and his wife offered travel advice and asked about New York. And just before last call, an unassuming young guy who had sat quietly in the corner got up, moved over, and sat next to us. He pulled out a book of illustrated postcards he had drawn, and in very broken English asked us to take a look. We looked through the two dozen or so postcards, each with explanations about his interests and travels. Then he asked us to pick one that we liked. Here’s the sales pitch, I thought. I said they were all very nice, and thank you for showing us (but no thank you). He went on to explain – his English wasn’t very good, he said, but pick one we liked. He wanted to draw one for us as a gift. And so he did.

He even had a cool little car that picked up his eraser bits.

And that’s how we met “John” Shimaneko, and got this very cool hand-drawn illustration.

We’ll miss Kyoto. We’ll miss the food, the nightlife, the bike rental, the temples – the heat, not so much – but most of all, we’ll miss the people. Like Shimaneko’s cat, it’s time to fly…

Today on the Shinkansen train from Tokyo to Kyoto, I experienced the seminal travel moment of every major journey overseas: my first squat toilet of the trip. When the door opens and there it is, facing you like some giant sinkhole in the floor of the bathroom, there’s a moment of anxiety not unlike your annual colonoscopy – “Oh no. Not this again.”

I quickly faced my fear and assumed the position. This was not my first rodeo. In fact, “rodeo” isn’t a bad metaphor, because you’re straddled over a beast that may kill you unless you can hold on long enough. I’ll skip the graphic details, obviously, but here are some observations I made during my tenure at the Mouth of the Devil:

First, this is a delicate procedure, made only more delicate by this one being on a moving train. A moving high-speed Japanese “bullet train,” that is. That position is unkind enough while stationary, it’s another when there’s a constant sway and shifting speeds.

Second, I suggest you take your wallet out of your back pocket before doing this. Don’t get me wrong, there were no mishaps, but a constant fear stuck with me during the entire event, made worse by the fact that my hands were preoccupied holding onto stabilizing rails, and any release of my grip could spell disaster. But next time, I’ll take precautions.

Third, I’ve always thought I had strong leg muscles. Untrue. My quads and calves were barking about 30 seconds in, made only worse by the discomfort of my jeans clinging tightly to my knees and thighs. This is one of those positions they make you assume in Gitmo, and I was trying to assume this position while taking care of important matters.

Lastly, there is no room for error. Unlike the typical western toilet, where you’ve got a straight shot, in this case you’re hovering a good six inches to a foot over the target. What your looking for here is a surgical strike, because carpet bombing will be as messy here as it was in Dresden during “the big one.”

But there are some advantages:

1. Excellent core strength work-out, both legs and abs.
2. There’s no lingering. There will be no reading of Entertainment Weekly or the ingredients of the Lysol can under the sink, or checking your Facebook updates.
3. You really get to know yourself, because you’re very focused on your body and its multiple interdependent functions.
4. You’ll truly value your suede Adidas sneakers, now more than ever.
5. There’s a somewhat cool, breezy lightness to the whole affair that you don’t get often, like skinny-dipping, or going commando.

These are the observations I made during my brief, two-minute interaction with fate. As I write this and think back on the whole thing, I almost miss it. Almost…

Hi there. Guess who’s alive and well? I know it’s been a few days, so here’s a quick introduction to what happened to us upon our arrival in Tokyo:

1. We found out our apartment was unavailable due to a burst pipe during a typhoon.
2. We got a replacement apartment about a half-hour train ride from the city, nowhere near our original location.
3. I left my iPhone on the airport bus.

You’ve never really enjoyed jetlag until you’ve done it like this.

It all started off innocently enough. We bought wi-fi on the plane, and somewhere over the Arctic Circle, we found out that the apartment we had rented was not going to be available. I guess there really are typhoons in Asia, and one hit Tokyo just before we arrived, wiping out the apartment’s plumbing. So be it. Luckily our “landlady” Elizabeth let us use her own apartment rather than us getting hosed landing in Tokyo with nowhere to go. This honestly was very nice of her.

Her assistant Josephine met us in Shibuya to take us to the new apartment, which we were told was 20 minutes away. By train. We’d just come off a 14 hour flight and a 90-minute bus ride, so lugging our 40 pound bags around a crowded major metropolitan area wasn’t something we wanted to do for long. But we did. We walked several blocks, through some crowds, up some stairs, down some stairs, barged into a few students, up an elevator – oops, wrong floor – down an elevator, through a tunnel…WAIT…where’s my iPhone? WHERE DID I PUT MY IPHONE??!!

I left my iPhone on the airport bus. Holden Caulfield left the goddamn foils on the subway. I left my goddamn iPhone on the airport bus. And I simply gave up on it. It was gone.

Josephine called the airport bus company. Closed for the night. Josephine called Elizabeth. Elizabeth would call the bus company in the morning. So we kept on our long march, got on a subway to a commuter line, and a half-hour later, arrived well into the suburbs, exhausted, in the middle of nowhere, while somewhere on the highway back to Narita Airport, my brand new iPhone sat on a very clean, well-maintained plush Japanese bus seat. I imagined it looking out the window through one of its two iSight cameras, staring at the passing neon billboards, a small electronic tear rolling down its sleek, black, crystal 4-inch retina display as “Everybody’s Talkin’ at Me” played in the background. Exhausted, dejected, frustrated, and with little else to do, Amy and I went to bed.

Early the next day, with little sleep from jetlag, we left the suburban apartment and took an hour train/subway ride to the Tsukiji fish market. It’s awesome. Every kind of seafood, guys carving up massive frozen tuna, big pots of shrimp, uni, scallops…fantastic. It’s where you famously wait in line at the local stands to have the freshest sushi you’ll ever eat – for breakfast. So we got in line and waited. And waited…

And while we waited, Amy checked her email. AND…the bus company found my phone! Only in Japan! I assure you, once we were finally seated, that sushi breakfast was the most delicious, satisfying meal I’ve had in a while. I savored every taste of uni and hamachi as visions of iMessaging and Facebook apps danced through my head.

We got the iPhone back later that day. We moved to a centrally-located tourist hotel the next day. We got over our jetlag, and we went to the sumo finals (thanks to Elizabeth). We’ve checked out great neighborhood shops and restaurants, toured temples and shrines, and met really nice people. For example:

– Elizabeth, who helped us get the phone back, and got us the Sumo tickets.
– The waitress who patiently translated an entire menu into English for us.
– The woman I spilled my beer on at Sumo, who thanked me for giving her the opportunity to practice her English (this has got to be the first time someone thanked me for spilling beer on them).
– The restaurant owner who ran out to give us postcards of his place after we’d already dined, paid, and left.
– The metro employee who calmly explained that we’d transferred to a different line, and owed more money – but just pay when you get off at the station.
– The cook who spoke no English, yet offered us options through hand gestures, and made us the greatest potato salad I’ve ever eaten.

So after a rough start, it’s all been great. We’ll get a little more in-depth in upcoming posts, but that’s a good recap of how things kicked off, and how you roll with the punches. It’s all going well. We’re fine, Mom. Actually, we’re pretty great.

Well, here we are, seated in the JAL lounge, ten minutes before boarding our flight to Japan. The old apartment is empty, our things are in storage, and we’re packed and ready. A few final thoughts:

Did we overpack? Probably. But maybe not. My pack is 40 lbs. I seem to have clothing options from trekking in the foothills of the Himalayas to dining at a Michelin starred restaurant in Tokyo. And I packed a tie. A necktie! Why did I pack a necktie?! If I really NEED a necktie, I’m sure I can buy one, and very cheaply. But I have a necktie. We’ll see how all this goes, and what gets sent home, and what seems to be missing.

Here’s another story of God laughing at me – last night, our final night before leaving for a year, we stayed at Amy’s sister’s place. I was about to brush my teeth before going to bed, and I knocked my toiletry bag (and all contents minus the toothbrush) into the toilet. Apropos of the name “toiletry bag.” That’s a few months supply of toiletries down the drain – literally. In all honesty, most of the contents dried off easily, including the bag. However, about 30 Q-tips got soaked. There were no survivors.

Lastly, I’m thrilled to say I finally severed my relationship with Time Warner Cable of NYC. Like an old girlfriend, we had some wonderful times together. Quiet nights alone, a lot of laughs. But Time Warner Cable, you were often mean to me. Unreliable. You didn’t even show up sometimes. You lied about your credentials. But I just couldn’t be without you. Not anymore. It was a rocky twenty years, Time Warner Cable of NYC, but I’m over you. Goodbye.

Alright, they just announced boarding… Next stop, Tokyo!

Hi Mom.

Just to let you know, all is going well. So here it is, our first blog post, and with it the answers to a lot of questions people want to know about our planned around-the-world trip:

When are you leaving?

We’re both finished with work, and will be leaving the last week of September.

Do you still have a lot to do?

A ton. We still need to pack the apartment, find a storage unit, get everything moved, get visas and vaccinations, see all our doctors before we leave, and a bunch of other little loose ends to tie-up…the list goes on.

Speaking of moving, what are you doing with all your stuff?!

We’re putting everything in storage for the year, and will move it to wherever we relocate to when we get back.

Where are you starting your trip?

We’re starting our trip with a month in Japan. Flying into Tokyo and definitely visiting Kyoto and Hokkaido, as well.

Do you know where you’re going after that?

Roughly, but we’re going to be flexible. After Japan, we’ll work our way through the rest of the Far East and SouthEast Asia in November/December/Early January (South Korea, China, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos, Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore), likely spending the holidays in SouthEast Asia. Then on to Australia/New Zealand in Jan/Feb. Hoping to be in India by mid-March for the Holi festival (with stops in Nepal and Bhutan). Africa in April (hiking Kilimanjaro and visiting Ghana). South America in May/June (including Brazil for the World Cup). Then finishing up next summer/early fall in Europe. A tentative schedule, of course, but it gives you a rough idea of our journey.

Most importantly: why? What made you decide to do this?

That’s a great question. Ultimately, it was a matter of will, and timing. We’re only recently married, and we’ve been asking ourselves a lot of questions about the future – where we want to live, how we want to live, and where life would take us. And we both love to travel. We’ve been all over together, and we’ve both wanted to travel the world for an extended period. But what’s tough is actually making the leap and doing it. What we realized is that we were ready for a change, and that if we were ever going to make that big leap, now was the time to do it – the right time in our careers, the right time financially, and the right time in our marriage. We’re old enough to have the capability, and young enough to have the flexibility. So we’re re-inventing our lives, and starting by following that dream of traveling around the globe. And that’s led us here.

Are you scared or nervous about this trip, and the big change in your lives?

Change is always going to be somewhat difficult, and there will always be moments of fear and anxiety. But we’re both impassioned, excited, and ultimately thankful that we’re getting this opportunity. We’re fine, Mom.